A Poem From The Playwright

Some words of advice for the actor, from a playwright who's been up on that stage before ...

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A Poem From The Playwright

I hope my words inspire you
To be all that you can be
But before you get into costume
Don’t forget to take a pee.

You can move them with my dialogue
And make them laugh when you get your chance
But none of that will matter
If you wet your pants.

They’ll applaud when you deserve it
They will cheer and shout “Encore!”
But things can get real quiet
When there’s a warm puddle on the floor.

The lights make you all look sexy
The make-up makes you glow
But I’m sure they’ll see you blushing
When the urine starts to flow.

I’d like to give you each a great big bear-hug
“Just break a leg!” I’ll say.
But if I notice some soggy trousers
I’ll have to stay away.

So please heed these words of caution
From someone who’s been up there
Just drain that bladder completely
And avoid piss-soaked underwear.

Control! Control! You must learn control!